14 May Where is the honour in killing?
By Moona Popal
Families committing the heinous crime of filicide, in the name of honour is something you would assume was stopped or left confined in most Middle Eastern countries. However, honour has become a kind of disease that’s managed to spread past the Middle East and reached high developed countries like the UK, where women are meant to be considered equal to men.
In the 21st century many things have advanced, but some things have still remained the same. Women are constantly abused mentally and physically at the hands of their family members or partners.
The concept of “honour” has become difficult to define. To most families, their honour can be at stake for many reasons, which can include from refusing an arranged marriage, entering a relationship disapproved by the family or behaving and dressing in a way thought to be inappropriate.
In Afghanistan while it might not be against the law to run away or escape forced marriages, the courts routinely convict women, fleeing abusive homes raped with the intent to commit zina (adultery), which are often simply referred to as ‘moral crimes’.
26-year-old Samiya managed to escape her home country Afghanistan at the age of 18 after the brutal murder of the man she dreamt a future with. His murder was carried out by her own 2 brothers in 2009. She knew if she did not escape soon, she too would soon be killed being held responsible for disgracing the family honour and respect.
Samiya was 17 when she met her lover, Mohammed in school. Her boyfriend couldn’t keep it a secret and wanted to do everything the Islamic way. He decided to go and ask for her hand in marriage, hoping her parents would accept him. However, from then and now, she wishes she had never let him take that step which cost him his life.
Samiya still relives the day she witnessed her boyfriend beaten for hours by a hammer, and then mercilessly pushed off the third floor balcony.
“I met him in Kabul, when I was still attending school. At first I was too scared to even look at him because of the constant fear of being caught by my brothers or being judged by the people around me, but it was too hard to neglect him since I loved him a lot.”
When asked about her thoughts of visiting her home country, Samiya answered firmly, “NO, I don’t think I could ever go back home, knowing my family are the murderers of my lover. I know what they will do to me if I went back.”
There are many women like Samiya living in constant fear, however, Samiya managed to get herself out of that place and lead a new life, with her husband in London.
She described her relationship with her husband as full of, “love” and understanding.
Samiya was still in prison for committing ‘zina’ (adultery) and bringing shame to her family name. During that time, her cousin who lives in London managed to get her out of that mess.
“When I was in Kabul, my cousin contacted me and told me that her friend’s brother had seen my picture and wanted to ask for my hand in marriage.”
Samiya described how she was hesitant and, felt guilty even thinking about a new life, but gave in after being free from prison and having nowhere to go.
“My cousin explained to me like a mother that I could forget my past and lead a new life away from the fear of being killed.”
There are many charities dedicated to help honour abuse victims like Samiya.
Charities like the ‘Halo project’, ‘Honour refuge’, ‘Karma nirvana’ and IKWRO, aim to help honour victims overcome the fear they live with, as well as provide the victims help in every aspect, such as education, jobs and helping them find homes.
Many of these honour-based crimes go unnoticed, but there have been a few which have shed light on the cruelty young women face under the name of honour. One case in particular of 25-year-old Samaira Nazir, who was stabbed to death 18 times at her family home in Southall London in April 2005. Her brother and cousin were convicted of her murder and jailed for life. The reason for the barbaric act on Samaira was for deciding to go against her family’s wishes and wanting to marry someone outside her caste.
Halo charity has said, “Honour is used as a way to restrict women from having their basic human rights taken away from them; women are expected to keep up a façade of what their male relatives or partner expect of them or they face abuse or even death.”
“We help women spot the signs of being abused, when they themselves aren’t sure, whether or not they need to take a step against it; that’s when we come in.”
Jasvinder Sanghera, a survivor of forced marriage, as well as chief executive and founder of Karma Nirvana, a charity dedicated to victims of honour abuse. Karma Nirvana is an award-winning charity based in the UK, aiming to offer victims the chance to speak to professionals to help them. The expert will assess their issues and provide help accordingly.
Mrs Sanghera first set up the charity after the tragic death of her younger sister, who was forced into a marriage by her parents and ended up committing suicide.
“One of the main issues we deal with, is of young women being forced into forced marriages by their families, and being threatened if they speak against it.”
Unfortunately, most people still live with the belief that honour crimes are confined to certain countries, religion, or social stratum, hence failing to see the number of women being abused every day behind closed doors everywhere.
Although statistics show that both men and women can be targets of honour based violence or killings, women are revealed to be more commonly targeted. The honour based violence awareness network (HBVAN) stresses that there is little scriptural support for honour killing in any major religion and has been condemned by several high-status religious leaders. According to the statistic’s an estimate of 12 honour killings takes place in the UK every year and, around 5000 honour killings take place worldwide every year.
Forced Marriage Unit (FMU) is a special unit based in the UK, made up of experts, who can offer victims advice and support. If victims are looking to escape a forced marriage, the unit can help you access housing services and refuge. The victims can also be assisted in organising benefits and permanent housing so you can start to rebuild your life and gain independence.
The number of cases of honour-based violence recorded by the police increased from 3335 in 2014 to 5595 in 2015, an increase of 53%, since the introduction of the law criminalising forced marriage.
However, despite the significant rise in reporting since 2014, the volume of cases referred to the Crown Prosecution Service for a charging decision is the lowest it has been for five years. The latest figures published by the CPS indicate that only 256 cases of “honour” based violence were referred to them by the police in 2016/17, just 5% of the cases reported over a similar time period. The 256 referrals resulted in 215 prosecutions and a subsequent 122 convictions.
Data taken by the ‘Office for National Statistics’, have revealed that an estimated 1.9 million adults aged 16-59 years experienced domestic in the last year, according to the year ending March 2017 crime survey for England and Wales, and according to the research conducted by the office, 1.2 million of the domestic abuse related and homicides recorded between April 2013 to March 2016 were females, that is about 70% of the victims.
So the question to ask now, is how can we as society tackle the backward thinking of some people, who use cultural traditions as an excuse to justify honour killings? The issue needs to be identified in the context of violence and suffering of women, and the inequality found throughout society. Where nothing has changed, and as a woman, your only offence is invariably refusing to bend to the will of her family.
The root of violence against women is a society which passes moral judgement any time a woman chooses to live or dress or behave which is ‘out of line’. Women are constantly expected to be subservient to men and the patriarchal order.
How long will it take society to realise that women are equal to men? How long will it take us to move our cultural traditions and replace them with restored logical and fair laws? How much longer will women continue in their plight for justice?
